2019: A New Years Resolution or Revolution?

     In less than 2 hours as I write this, we will be welcoming in a New Year. It's the final year of this decade I guess we call the "teens" or whatever we call it. So many people are making their New Years resolutions. Losing weight, exercise, paying off debts are just a few. I myself don't like to call them resolutions but goals I set. In 2013, in my previous blog, I said I wanted to run in a 5K, learn how to cook and teach myself to play the guitar. Since then I hurt my back so the 5K is out, I bought a guitar 2 years later and it's collecting dust begging me to strum it and I had no choice but to learn how to cook now that I am on my own. This year I have 3 goals I have set!

1. I want to discipline myself to exercise more. Get to the gym, ride my bike and take better care of this body God gave me. Being in shape is amazing. When you walk up your staircase and you are out of breath, that's not a good thing. Eating healthier is also part of this goal!

2. I want to set a goal where I do a "Random act of kindness" at least once a week. Working in a public setting, you meet all types of people. You meet some of the happiest but you also meet some grumpy. I want to show kindness in all kinds of creative ways this year!

3. I want to stay close to Jesus by reading His word, praying each day and sharing my faith. My relationship to Him is so important and I want to continue to strive to live for Him the best I can.

In closing, sometimes these resolutions can become a revolution or a war. Sometimes your body doesn't want to exercise, or wake up early and read the bible or even show kindness to a total stranger. Last year my exercise goal faded in June after my second kidney stone battle. This coming New Year, I pray I will be blogging on December 31, 2019 saying proudly that I reached each goal to the best of my ability. So, HAPPY NEW YEAR FRIENDS AND FAMILY. May God bless you in the coming year!!

SEE YOU NEXT YEAR!! OKAY...NEXT WEEK!!   

I PRESS ON IN 2019!!

     I know we are in the Christmas Season and have 2 more days to celebrate. Lately I have been thinking a lot about 2019. Since September when I began this blog, I wrote to you all about my struggles and victories these past 5 1/2 years. I do believe we can learn a lot from our past as we gain life experiences and go through difficult situations. But I also believe we do need to look at the present and future and evaluate where we are at presently and where we believe God is leading us next. This past week, I have been thinking a lot about a particular scripture in the Bible found in Philippians 3:13,14. The Apostle Paul wrote "Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

    

     From 2011 - 2013, I wanted to lose some weight so I started running 3 days a week. I would set a course and wake up before the sun set and run through my neighborhood, sometimes even when the temperature was in the teens! During my two year running season, I managed to get up to 6 miles! My season ended when I hurt my back unfortunately. I do remember trying real hard to push myself toward my final destination. I used to time myself and try to improve on my time. I pushed my body real hard and although my legs were killing me, I put a lot of effort into finishing the course I set out to complete. Oh, and I did lose weight which did make me happy. My point is simple...I pressed on!

    

     Each and every single day when it comes to the Christian life, I believe we have to press on and strive each day to live for Jesus! We also have to move forward and not dwell on the past but trust God and allow Him to direct us to where He is leading us. What happened in the past is over and done with. We can't change the past but we can change one thing...ourselves. So this coming year, I want very much to "Press on" in my relationship with Jesus. 2018 was a great year for me but there were challenges also. My health, finances, family issues and starting new jobs were a big part of it. But I realize one thing! I could not have done it without God's help. I am so grateful that I have a personal relationship with Jesus! Together with Him, I will continue to "Press on toward that goal" in 2019.

I PRAY YOU HAVE A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS AND BLESSED NEW YEAR!!    

IT'S CHRISTMAS TIME PART 2 (Offended by what?)

     I'm sitting behind my laptop on this rainy, wet Sunday and we have 9 more days until Christmas 2018! I love driving through neighborhoods and looking at Christmas lights people hang on their homes, the blow up Santa's, reindeer and even the Abominable Snowman guy from Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer is seen on Stony Brook Road. Families all have traditions when they decorate trees, open gifts and enjoy family time which is so important. These last few years, what has bothered me is that everybody finds something to get offended at. Recently, we were all told we had to call our trees "Holiday Trees" because it was offensive. We were also told saying "Merry Christmas" was offensive and people preferred "Happy Holidays" instead. Now I am hearing more nonsense like the nativity scenes that towns display in public are offensive and so is posting a sign that says "Merry Christmas." Or how about the latest? The song "Baby it's cold outside" which was written in the 1940's has been removed by many radio stations around our country because it is considered a song about rape. What is going on? Are we now a generation that gets offended over every single thing? I can think of many things we should get offended at both as a Christian and as an American. I'm going to list 6 but trust me there are many more we can list. Here it is:

1. PRAYER IN SCHOOLS

I am offended that on June 25, 1962, less than 2 years before I was born prayer was removed from public schools. The Supreme Court voted against prayer being allowed in schools in the case Engel vs. Vitale, unfortunately right here on Long Island in New Hyde Park. In the 1950's, the number one problem in public schools was chewing gum. After prayer was removed, the number one problem in public schools is...? Drug abuse. And it's getting worse. The argument has always been "it's a separation of church and state." Today we have to fight to get God back in schools. How sad is that? We need prayer back in schools and most of all we need God back in our schools!

2. CRITICISM OF OUR PRESIDENT

Okay, let me just say I am not one to discuss politics. But I will say that I am offended how much criticism and "poking fun" at our President I see, especially on late night television. Saturday Night Live is a huge culprit and I refuse to watch or support that program. As a Christian, I believe we need to pray for our President regardless of whether we agree with his decisions or not. I am offended that even on our news media, President Trump receives so much criticism. Let's pray for him! Okay, my political rant is over.

3. HOW WOMEN ARE TREATED

Working in a public setting, you see a lot of things. One thing I do see a lot of is how men treat women. I remember being on a crowded train and having to stand for the majority of the ride. I was shocked how not one man who was sitting offered his seat to a lady. Instead, they sat there and refused to be a gentleman. I also see men who won't even hold a door open for a lady. What ever happened to manners? Sure, people will say women want to be self sufficient but I was raised in a generation where you treated a lady with utmost respect...period.

4. HOW CHILDREN ACT TODAY (Parents are clueless)

Again, working in a public environment at Chick Fil-a, I am amazed of the lack of discipline children receive today. A parent will allow a child to scream bloody murder in public and not correct them. They will also let them run amok all around the restaurant and say things like "Hey Bud, come back to the table and finish your nuggets, sweetheart." No correction. No discipline. Instead of being a parent they would rather be a "pal" or "friend." It offends me because of the future. What kind of leader will they be as they grow up? I thank God my parents disciplined me!

5. PUBLIC BATHROOMS

This one is very disturbing to me, but I am offended that we now have stores that have Gender Neutral Bathrooms which means that if my daughter goes into a bathroom, there could be some man in a stall next to her? No way, Jose!! That is offensive. Bottom line is that God made man and God made woman. End of story. He never makes mistakes. I don't even like writing about this because it is creepy and I believe it's very evil how society has accepted this. Yuck!!!

6. DEMONSTRATING YOUR FAITH IN PUBLIC

As a Children's Pastor, I had many opportunities to share my faith in public. From 1991 - 2013 our church participated in the Town of Smithtown Memorial Day Parade. For 3 weeks before the parade we painted our float and then I had a group of  church construction guys come the Saturday before to assemble the float onto a trailer. The Knights of Columbus organized the event and in my opinion did a horrible job. They always put us in the back of the parade and gave us trouble. We were the only float in the parade after marching bands, the Boy scouts and other organizations. I always had puppets lip syncing to children's Christian music and every year we were told it was offensive. We even tried playing patriotic music mixed in with Christian Music but that didn't help. We also participated in Smithtown Festival Day and had a booth. We played Christian music there as well. I remember a guy walking over to me and saying "Your music is too loud. Turn down that Christian @$%#@." Meanwhile only a hundred feet away from us, a Classic Rock Radio station was blasting Led Zeppelin. What offends me is how the name of Jesus proclaimed in public is so offensive to people yet, it's okay to have fortune tellers and New Age garbage everywhere. That's okay in society. Jesus did say we are living in the "Last Days." Boy, is that ever evident!                      

     I'm sure there are hundreds of other things we can list that is offensive to us that actually makes sense and is not nonsense. Bottom line is during this Christmas season and during the month of December is Jesus is the Reason for the Season. So MERRY CHRISTMAS!! Enjoy this great season with your CHRISTMAS TREE and most of all HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!!

Until next time! Be blessed today and always!

IT'S CHRISTMAS TIME PART 1

     It's so hard to believe that as I am writing this, we will be celebrating Christmas in 15 days! I hope and pray that you and your families have a blessed Christmas and a Happy New Year. I'm sure you are a lot like me when it comes to celebrating Christmas. I have very fond memories growing up celebrating the holiday with my family first as a boy in New Jersey then moving to New York as a 9 year old. Christmas had a double meaning for me. Being raised Catholic, I always knew it was the birth of our savior Jesus Christ but I was also raised to believe in Santa Claus...you know...that heavy set dude with the white beard who wore red, drove a sleigh that was pulled by reindeer and somehow in one night went to billions of kids homes going down the chimney and delivering gifts. I believed in Santa until about 4th grade when my world was shattered. I saw Santa smoking a cigarette and a local store and when in 4th grade during school, I blurted out to a classmate "I wish Christmas was everyday" and he said "If that were the case, your parents would be broke." I did get a lot of cool gifts as a kid and I am very grateful my parents didn't spoil my brother and sister and I. Christmas Eve we always attended Catholic Mass up until we all received Jesus in our hearts. As I grew up, I started looking at Christmas a lot differently. To me it became less about the gifts and more about the birthday of Jesus. It started to bother me how the focus was not on the birthday of Jesus but more on the other "things" the world would dwell on. Don't get me wrong, I realize that decorating your Christmas tree is fun, putting lights on your house looks amazing, singing fun Christmas songs is fun and watching Rudolf the red nosed reindeer, Frosty the snowman, the year without a Santa Claus and National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation is a blast but seriously, the Christmas season cam be rough.

    

     I'm going to be truthful. Earlier in this decade I struggled in my own heart with Christmas and the month of December. With a struggling marriage and frustration in my ministry at my previous church, I started to seriously hate the holiday. In 2013 after losing my pastoral position, I even purposely worked on Christmas Day. In 2015, I saw the ugly side of the holiday. I took a seasonal job at Kohl's and had to work Thanksgiving evening. I will never do that again. I watched customers fighting over flat screened TV's, pushing people out of the way and fighting with you while you are on the cash register over 35 cents. Yes! 35 cents! The same people who drive SUV's!

     It is a known fact that there are more suicides in the month of December than any other month in the year. You look at peoples faces and all you see is frustration, anger and stress. Many are striving for that "Christmas Spirit" and looking for a reason to be "jolly." People spend hundreds of dollars on gifts, decorations, food and other "things." It seems that someone back in the day had a great idea that maybe just maybe if we market this holiday the right way, we can make lots and lots of money. They seemed to forget there is a Reason for the Season...Jesus...His Birthday. I also realize there are others who have it much harder than me. What about the homeless in New York City? What about the family who lost a loved one in 2018 and are trying to get through the season without that loved one? Or what about that person who may have lost a job in 2018 and are struggling financially?

    Lets remember what this season is really about! It's the Birthday of our Lord and savior Jesus Christ!!

UNTIL NEXT TIME!!            

SO, WHAT'S NEXT FOR ME???

     So, now that you have heard my life story, well actually my last five and a half years, I'm sure many of you might be asking, "So what's next?" There are 3 goals I have set for the future.

1. I WOULD LIKE TO DEVELOP MY OWN MINISTRY!

If you know me well, you know I have a calling on my life to do Children's Ministry. I have been doing it for well over 34 years!! This past year I decided to take a break from it to focus on myself and to heal from many hurts I have encountered. It's the best decision I ever made. In October, I was invited to speak at a local Christian School and it was the first time in 9 months that I actually picked up Grandpa Lou and Shelton the Shark, two of my most popular ventriloquist figures. The day before my speaking engagement, a dear friend of mine asked me to take them to Lighthouse Mission in Bellport, NY so they could get clothing for a relative. When we walked in, Pastor Jim the director gave me a huge hug and introduced me to his staff. He asked me if I would consider doing a kids program on a future Saturday morning and I said "Absolutely!" He told me I was very gifted and a blessing to their mission. After we left the mission, my mind drifted to the many times I ministered at the mission, sometimes alone and sometimes with our Kids in Missions students. Although I seriously did enjoy my break from ministry during this past year, my heart has always been to reach children. That following morning, I spoke at the Emanuel Lutheran School Chapel. I was a little nervous speaking especially since it was something I had not done for quite some time. After doing my introductions, I felt comfortable. It was just like riding a bike! I did Grandpa Lou, Shelton the Shark, some object lessons and some gospel illusions.

     After that chapel, I spent time in prayer asking God if it was His will for me to be back in ministry and around Thanksgiving I felt I got a green light. So, I am happy to announce that I am planning on starting a ministry as a Children's Ministry consultant and a Child Evangelist in 2019. With my many years of experience as a Children's pastor, I would love to help other children's pastors and Children's Ministry  Directors establish a vision, give insight, be an "Aaron" to them as well as an encouragement. I have been in there shoes. I've been discouraged frustrated and have even knocked on the door of burnout. I know I can be a great resource. Second, I would like to travel to churches and do Kids Crusades and Children's programs using my puppets, gospel illusions and games. I am even thinking of developing a Game Show theme for families down the road. I would like to build this slowly, one step at a time and travel on Sundays, my one day off here in NY, NJ, PA and CT. I am asking for prayer warriors who will pray for me. We all know when you step out in faith, the enemy loves to attack. Would you be willing to pray for me? I tried doing this in 2013 but truthfully, I was not ready then. Now, I feel that I am ready to serve! I am excited about this new venture! I will be working on a website, printing business cards and, of course trying to think of  name for it. Stay tuned!

2. Secondly, I would like to use my writing talents for the Lord. My main problem is time! I do have some projects in the works...a children's book and another book. Getting books published is a challenge but I'm up for it. Finding the time to write while working 2 jobs is tough. It is a goal of mine to get my work published.

3. Lastly, without getting into every detail of my complicated life, I would like to see a healing in my family especially with my two oldest children. They are 25 and 24 and I am praying for reconciliation. That's all I will say about it. Please pray for me in this.

THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR READING MY BLOGS EVERY WEEK AND FOR YOUR WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT     

GOD CLOSES 2 DOORS AND OPENS 2 DOORS

      FALL 2018

      What always amazed me about the Christian life is how God is always on your side. I have seen him repeatedly open and close doors for me. The very first door he closed for me during this past Fall season, quite honestly, was the door he closed at Cheeburger Cheeburger on August 24th. I was very happy to leave that job but was concerned about my finances. That job at Cheeburger did pay me more than Chick Fil A, yet I knew God would open a door and yes He certainly did. The first door he opened came out of nowhere. A friend of a friend told me about a job opportunity. The crazy thing about it was they had no clue what the job was and said it was temporary. I figured I should check it out and could always so no if it was illegal or against the law so to speak. I was given a phone number of a gentleman named Fred and when I called him he said "Do you have any idea what this job entails?" I said, "No, but I just wanted to explore and options. I'm looking to make extra money." It turned out to be a Company called George Thomas Brass & Bronze Works, a machine shop in Bay Shore, NY. Fred invited me to come down and check it out then he said, "It's only temporary!" Hmm....temporary...I've heard that statement many times. My mind drifted back to 1984 as a Northeastern Bible College student. "Just help with this puppet ministry for one semester. You will never have to do it again!" I ended up doing it for a year!! Fast forward to 1987 at Smithtown Gospel Tabernacle. "Just lead our puppet ministry for a season." I ended up not only leading it but becoming the children's pastor 4 years later and lasted there for 22 years!

    I met Fred at his company which was very small. He showed me the his shop and told me what the job entailed. The job was basically placing parts in a machine cleaning them off then placing them in a second machine. Very easy! What was an even greater blessing was the pay! Much better than Cheeburger!! And also what turned out to be temporary is actually not. I started there in August and I am still working for Fred as I write this!

The Second closed door was actually very bizarre. Fred from Taylor Brass (I actually have two bosses named Fred, the other is at Chick Fil A) knew I worked at Chick Fil A and he told me about a friend of his in the machine shop industry looking for a "Plater." At that point, I was wrestling with my future career wondering if the restaurant industry was for me and trying to survive on this expensive region we call Long Island. I called his friend John and set up an appointment. John sounded like your typical gruff New York businessman. We set up an interview for September 11th. John's company was also small with only 5 employees. When I pulled up to his building it was pouring rain and maybe I should have seen that as a sign from God. I actually never interviewed with John. He was very distracted trying to fix a problem with a computer. He had me meet two of his workers who showed me what the job entailed. Being a visual learner I tried my best to grasp what it was about. It was nothing like the machine shop and was mainly working with chemicals. While being there I really honestly wrestled with if this was for me but knew I needed health benefits and more money. After seeing what the job was about I went in to talk to John. All I can say is that he was very cold and very distracted. I tried to make small talk with him. He had Mets and Rangers paraphernalia in his office so I told him I like the same teams. He truthfully was so distracted and told me he was on his way to a Mets game that night. I asked about what he would pay an hour then told him I could start September 24th. He apologized for not speaking with me longer and left. I truthfully walked out of that company confused. For one week I wrestled with if I made the right decision. The next day I told Fred at Chick Fil A I would only be working there part time starting September 24th. He had no reaction whatsoever so I thought maybe that is a sign that this is from God. You would have thought that after my disastrous Cheeburger experience that I would have learned about having a peace about a work environment. NOPE! I remember waking up in the middle of the night feeling uneasy and just prayed, "Lord, show me if this is from you or not." This decision also affected my Bible study that I taught on Tuesday mornings. We were all set to change it to Friday nights.

The second open door was a blessing! Fred for Chick Fil A asked me to meet with him. He looked me in the eye and said without hesitation "What can we do to keep you here! We love your work ethic and appreciate your positive attitude and want you here." I told him it was the money. I was struggling financially and I was also honest with him. I told him I was wrestling with my decision to leave. He told me he would speak to the Owner/ Operator of the restaurant Bryan. What happened next was amazing. While I was on my break, Bryan spoke with me and, let's just say (I'm going to sound like the Godfather) he made me an offer I couldn't refuse. The door was wide open for me to stay at Chick Fil A Commack with the goal of allowing me to join there leadership team in due time. That next day I called John to tell him I would not be working for him. Let's just say he responded the way I expected. He was rude but it was all good. God closed 2 doors for me, but He also opened to amazing doors for me and I praise Him for that!!

UNTIL NEXT TIME               

REFLECTIONS OF THANKSGIVING

     I just wanted to take a break from my crazy soap opera life to reflect on a great holiday...Thanksgiving. Lately I have felt that Thanksgiving is the "Rodney Dangerfield" of every holiday. It simply gets no respect. In fact, I noticed driving home just a few days after Halloween that not only did stores have Christmas items for sale, people in my neighborhood had Christmas lights set-up outside. It almost seems like we all want to rush into the Christmas season and forget Thanksgiving. Don't get me wrong, I know that Christmas is fun and we all love lights, Christmas trees, gifts and enjoying that wonderful Christmas spirit but what about Thanksgiving? What about taking time to thank God for what you have and for how He has blessed you?
    
     I have great memories as a kid on Thanksgiving. Growing up we would go to Grandma and Grandpa Harff's house in Secaucus, NJ. My Dad was an only child so we spent the day with my Grandparents along with my Dad's Aunt Gladys and Uncle Frank. Frank was my grandfathers brother. My Grandparents had a very small house. The houses on their block were separated by driveways and you felt like you were in Brooklyn. My Grandpa smoked cigars so the house reeked of them. I have great memories of watching football with my brother Mike, usually the Detroit Lions game at 12:30. I also remember my brother and I would sit at my Grandpa's bar in the basement and he would make us Shirley Temples or as he called them with his NJ accent "Shoiley Temples." We thought we were hot stuff sitting at the bar drinking them. While the turkey cooked, as appetizers, my Grandma made celery with cream cheese inside along with other "snacks.". My brother, sister and I devoured the celery/cream cheese treats and my Dad told us every year "You are going to spoil your appetites!!


     My Grandpa was a huge tease and loved teasing my brother and I calling us "Fair haired boys" and "Chizzler's." When we told him we played little league baseball he would always say "Nah. you play for the Bloomer Goils."  Although we knew he loved us, he was a very difficult man and we often wondered what my Grandma saw in him. She was the total opposite of him, a quiet, gentle lady. He loved to talk and didn't have a shy bone in his body. He told the same stories every year about how he and his friend Snarky went fishing and how strong Snarky was. We never met Mr. Snarky and I for one always wondered if he was real. We always enjoyed our turkey and I was a huge fan of the turkey leg. The only negative impact that holiday had on me and my family was my Grandpa's temper. He was known for fighting over the most ridiculous topics...Politics, doctors and grass....yes grass. It caused my family to shift the holiday to New York and unfortunately without Aunt Gladys and Uncle Frank. Through the years I spent Thanksgiving on Long Island, in New Jersey and in Pennsylvania. But every year I always gave thanks to God for the roof over my head, the food that He has provided, the jobs that I had, the car I drove, for my health and for my amazing family. But most importantly, I thank God for His one and only Son Jesus who died on the cross for my sins. I have never been homeless, never gone hungry and God had always taken care of me.


     So this year as you gather around your table with turkey, veggies, mashed potatoes, stuffing and an assortment of goodies for dessert, take some time to say thanks to God for all He has provided and done for you.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!!!                   

RETURN TO CHICK FIL A (May 2018 to present)

     Like I mentioned in my previous blog, things at Cheeburger Cheeburger were not going like I was hoping. I knew I needed a backup plan. In a perfect world, I would have seen a sign posted at a church that read "Help Wanted: Children's Pastor with A LOT of experience. Inquire within!" But we know the world is certainly not perfect and although that would have been awesome, there are many hurdles you need to go over to get hired at a church. Not too many churches will take a gamble on a children's pastor who is separated from his wife. I always knew that my experience at Chick Fil A would help me tremendously. The Port Jefferson location was the first to open on Long Island (in October 2015) but it was no where near the Cheeburger restaurant. Two other Chick Fil A's opened on Long Island in November 2016.....Hicksville and Commack. Hicksville was out of my way heading west and Commack was a perfect place to apply. It was right on my way home. On my way home I stopped by to speak with a manager and was told to apply online. Within a few days I received a call from a gentleman named Fred Winter. I met Fred and other Commack team members when they trained at our Port Jefferson location. Fred and I set up an interview and I was hired. My first day was May 24th.

     Returning to Chick Fil A after a two month absence was weird. I was hired as a team member not a manager and I was okay with that. I worked mornings because they knew I had experience opening. It was fun getting to know my new team members. I'm sure some of the kids wondered who this gray haired dude was. I worked mostly on register and dining room and sometimes window. I will have to admit I was surprised how much I forgot (like how to make a shake) but loved the challenge of working hard. I do want to say that working at Chick Fil A is a great job and if you have a teen in your home looking for a job, give CFA a shot. The core values are amazing as well as the amazing atmosphere. They will not only learn a lot about the restaurant business but will experience great life lessons. As I am writing this, I am now full time with this amazing company but I did come close to leaving in September. I'll keep you in suspense and share that after next weeks Thanksgiving blog! 

UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN  

CHEEBURGER CHEEBURGER...A DISASTER DISASTER (March - Augsut 2018)

     It was early in March 2018 and like I blogged before I knew my season at Chick Fil A was over (so I thought ha ha). A close friend of mine told me about a restaurant in Farmingdale, NY called Cheeburger Cheeburger. Yes, not cheeseburger...CHEEBURGER! It was a takeoff from the old SNL skit form the 70's with John Belushi and Dan Akroyd. This restaurant was a chain that was started in 1986 in Sanibel Island, FL and this particular one was the lone surviving one on Long Island. I called one of the managers, Meghan for an interview and on a cold day I arrived at the airport plaza. The restaurant was very narrow and in the background you cold hear 1950's music being played. I was applying at this restaurant to be a manager and help build this restaurant and allow it to grow. It was foundering, so I had heard. My interview with Meghan was brief and we tried to figure out what days I could work. We agreed that I would be a manager Monday, Tuesday and Friday and on Thursdays, part of Fridays and Saturdays I would do deliveries. It seemed to me that this could work but I did grow concerned when Meghan said to me "Are you sure you want to do this?" I ignored that and was happy for a new challenge. I love challenges as you know. Meghan told me that we were going to have a meeting with all the workers on the Thursday before I started at night. There was a persistent problem with managers being disrespected, cell phone use and many callouts. When I arrived, I was anxious to meet the owner and thought he would lead the meeting. He was not there and I wondered why. I discovered during my 5 months at Cheeburger Cheeburger that this would be a growing trend with him unfortunately. All the workers signed a paper declaring they would obey all the rules listed. My brief Cheeburger career was about to begin. All I can say is "Wow!" What a disaster.

     My very first day was Monday, March 26th and I should have been alarmed on day one. We had 2 call outs!! Normally you would have two servers, one manager, two people in the kitchen, one person at the ice cream bar and a delivery driver....seven people. We had 5!!! Instead of learning how to manage, I ended up being the delivery driver for a day. As I got to know the staff, I realized that many of them were not happy. They had to work long hours with very little pay. Within the first 3 weeks I could see that this restaurant was run poorly. Many times supplies were low, there were a lot of call outs and truthfully, no one cared about the quality of service. Many of the young kids who worked at the ice cream bar quit to get better paying jobs. The interview process was awful. No applications, no background checks which resulted in terrible employees. It made for great comedy. One guy that they hired who worked in the kitchen could not read! He asked me whole weighing meat if the number n the scale was the number 7. I thought he was kidding but he wasn't. The kitchen staff could not pronounce his name so they gave him the nickname "Cookie" They hired one girl behind the bar who needed change, so she ran to the liquor store a few doors down and left the register open. When I confronted her, her answer was "Oops!" She did not last long. One of the delivery drivers was caught taking money. A server waked out mad about something and came back an hour later smelling like marijuana and high as a kite. One of the other managers came in for her shift reeking of alcohol. All I could say is "God, what did I get myself into?

     After only 3 weeks of all this, I knew I needed a backup plan so I contacted Chick Fil A in Commack and inquired about working there part time. I was convinced that Cheeburger (or as I called it Cheedungeon) would not make it through September. I knew the operations manager Fred from when he trained at the Port Jefferson CFA and he hired me even before I could utter a word at my interview with him. I started working at CFA Commack at the end of May and worked there part time in hopes to maybe get fulltime work which meant health insurance. When I told Cheeburger my plans to work more hours at CFA, they were annoyed. They even tried to talk me into working "off the books" and get health insurance from them claiming I was related to another manager. I did not want to lie or be deceitful. As I began to work at CFA Commack, it became apparent to me that that was where I belonged. I hated working at Cheeburger!! The restaurant was located in a shopping center and there was no drive to make improvements or advertise. What was glaring to me was the owner. He was never ever there during our hours of operations. I saw him sometimes before we opened. He would call around 4:00 every day and when we closed. All he cared about was what we made and are we cutting labor. The icing on the cake for me was when I had my kidney stone attack in the middle of me shift, I called him to tell him I HAD to get home as soon as possible to take my meds. He called me while I was driving in excruciating pain that I dropped the ball, I wasn't communicating about our staff etc. I was so angry but was in so much pain I just wanted to get home. Right above our restaurant at the shopping center were some FM radio stations on Long Island (B-103 and WALK). There was also a credit union/collections agency as well. The employees there were rude and obnoxious and many times I struggled to keep my Christian witness. They did things like demand a well done burger be cooked in 2 minutes, they questioned why during a special meal why the included drink was not a large, and they would tap their manicured finger nails on the counter while they were ordering. All they did was complain and it was getting to me! The communication at this restaurant was also terrible. We had specials listed on Facebook and Instagram that was not communicated to the managers. It was awful.

     In July, I knew it was time for me to phase out of this horrible place so I decided to work at CFA Commack Monday through Thursday and Saturday. I worked at Cheeburger Fridays. Many of the employees at Cheeburger, mainly the kitchen crew loved working with me and begged me to work 7 days a week at Cheeburger. I was flattered but knew I had to branch away from that disaster of a place. The restaurant was doing horrible and it was a matter of time that the doors would be shut for good. The was it was handled was terrible. I did not know that my last day would be Friday, August 24th. After my shift, the owner told me that another manager needed my keys. When I handed them to her, she said she already had keys. After my final shift I was so tired and thought nothing of it. What happened next was a horrible thing that could be done to employees and shows no class. The owner changed the locks on the door  and NEVER told anyone has was shutting the place down. Workers showed up Monday morning and a "closed sign" was on the door. No communication! He supposedly paid his employees for their final pay. As I am writing this I still have not received my pay!  

     I learned a lot from working this job...how not to run a restaurant....how people need to be treated  and how hard it is to be a light in the darkness. I feel sorry for the owner of this restaurant and pray one day he realizes happiness does not come with making lots of money, it comes when we receive Jesus as our Lord and savior. He makes all the difference in our lives!!        

           

REGENT UNIVERSITY/ MY LAST 3 MONTHS @ CFA PORT JEFF

     In the fall of 2017, the plans I had for the upcoming New Year 2018 were to work part time at Chick Fil-A Port Jefferson, get invited to join the pastoral staff at Christian Church at Holbrook full time and to start taking courses online at Regent University. As I sit here blogging, none of those 3 things came about. It was obviously not God's plan. In December of 2017, I decided to apply to take online classes at Regent University. I never got my bachelor's degree at Northeastern Bible College. I had to leave college early due to an illness that I later discovered was Celiac's disease. Back in the mid 1980's we didn't have internet. There were also no Christian Colleges on Long Island. Getting my degree is a priority for me and on my bucket list. I did get my associates at NBC and was proud of that. I was not the greatest of students struggling my entire life. I had a huge problem with reading comprehension and school was always a struggle for me. I decided to give it a shot and start pursuing my dream of getting my degree in Christian Ministry. I was accepted, I transferred my college credits to Regent and I was ready to rock and roll. My biggest problem was finances. After having the kidney stone in December, money was tight. I thought I would be able to afford Regent and taking out a loan was out of the question. I had to call them and tell them maybe some other time down the road when I actually have money to spend!!


    I also didn't realize that my career at Chick Fil -A Port Jeff would be coming to a screeching halt. My career there began in October 2015 and I was happy to be a part of the team. Like I mentioned in a previous blog, I was ale to work my way up from a team member to a manager. At this point, I was managing the closing shift and occasionally doing openings. In February, I started feeling like I needed a change. If you know me, you know I am always up for a challenge. As a pastor, I always loved to "stir the pot" and find creative ways to reach kids. As a restaurant manager, I was feeling like maybe I needed a slower pace. As much as I love Chick Fil-A and the culture, I was wrestling with my place at CFA Port Jefferson. I knew it would be a heart wrenching decision and something I needed to pray about. I have made so  many new friends at CFA Port Jefferson but knew it was time to move on. I accepted a position as a manger at a restaurant called Cheeburger Cheeburger in Farmingdale. I'll blog about it next time. Leaving CFA Port Jefferson was hard. They gave me a nice going away party on my last day, March 24th.     

UNTIL NEXT TIME

THE NOT SO WONDERFUL WORLD OF KIDNEY STONES - December 2017, June 2018

     Okay, let me back up a month and tell you about a challenging situation I faced. Before I start, let me just say ladies that I am not comparing kidney stone pain to childbirth. I obviously have and will never give birth to a child being that I am a man, but I can say that kidney stone pain is unbearable. I will never forget Friday, December 29, 2017 as long as I live. I was scheduled to work at Chick Fil-A Port Jefferson at 2pm. That morning I threw on a hoodie and sweat pants and drove down to Christian Church at Holbrook to make copies for Holbrook kids for that coming Sunday morning lesson. While driving on Patchogue/ Holbrook Road I started to feel a pain in my back. I thought my back was going out and as I approached the church, the pain became worse. As I started making copies, the pain became increasingly worse. What was wrong with me? I couldn't even finish copies and left all my materials in the copy room and struggled to get to my van. As I was driving I quickly called my Mom (Dr. Mom) thinking maybe she knew what the pain was and what to do. I was 3 days short of my health insurance going into effect. She told me it may be a kidney stone and to look for a health clinic and I found one on Portion Road in Farmingville. I literally crawled into the clinic leaning over the counter begging for them to see me ASAP. Of course they needed my information, license, health history and payment info. While I waited and called my boss at Chick Fil-A telling him I would not be in. He didn't even recognize my voice. The pain was unbearable. It felt like I had 20 knives stuck in my back. Finally a doctor saw me and it felt like I was in the examination room for over an hour, but it was only 15 minutes. I was sweating profusely and took of my hoodie leaning over the examination table. I begged the doctor to give me meds for the pain. She did and it felt like the nurse was taking her sweet time giving them to me. The doctor told me I needed to go to the ER. As I got to the ER at Mather Hospital my meds wore off. I was in the ER for about 5 hours, and was told after being examined and having an MRI that I had a kidney stone. I was sent home and picked up my meds. Thankfully, I passed the stone the following morning.

    That episode would not be my last.....RATS! On June 10th while at church, I felt discomfort in my back. At that moment, I didn't think it was another stone. Again, the pain was unbearable and I spent that Sunday afternoon back at Mather Hospital. This time I knew it was another stone. I went through the same routine....MRI....sent home....meds.. etc....etc...I didn't work for 2 days and thought I passed the stone. At the time, I was working part time at Cheeburger Cheeburger, a restaurant I was managing in Farmingdale off of 110 (I'll share that experience in a blog soon) and part time at Chick Fil-A Commack (I'll share that as well soon). That Friday about 6 hours into my 11 hour shift I felt discomfort. I thought I passed the stone earlier in the week. Could it be I had a second stone? So soon? Again the pain was unbearable and I had to call my boss that I needed to go home. Driving on the Long Island Expressway was murder. I felt every bump! I got home, grabbed my meds and went to bed. I had to cancel the first of my two shifts at Chick Fil-A Commack that Saturday. 2 hours into my shift I had another kidney stone attack and had to leave early. I managed to get home again and made it through the night. I was hesitant to go back to the ER a second Sunday in a row because I had no health insurance, but I had no choice. A dear friend drove me and I unfortunately spent Father's Day back at Mather. I was planning on taking my kids to the movies to see the movie Incredibles 2, but that had to be delayed for a few weeks. After the same old routine, MRI and being examined, the doctor told me I never passed the stone I had a week prior to that.

After going through this ordeal which I pray never happens again, It made me think about the pain Jesus suffered for you and me on the cross of Calvary. He did it so that our sins, those bad things we have done would be forgiven for us. He did it so that we would be saved from sin and made new. I am so grateful that God sent His one and only Son to pay that price just for me, but also for every human being on this planet. I am so grateful that He rose again and he offers us an incredible gift...the gift of eternal life!

UNTIL NEXT TIME           

     

CHRISTIAN CHURCH OF HOLBROOK PART 2 (December 2016 - January 2018)

Around Christmastime, 2016 I was beginning to feel strongly that I wanted to get involved at CCH (Christian Church at Holbrook) so I set up an appointment with Pastor Peter right after the new year. I thoroughly enjoyed attending the church as well as the Men's small group I was in, but when you have a heart and burden for kids, you can't just walk away from it. I did have some opportunities to share at Christian schools, but I was not involved with kids ministry for quite some time. I was ready. I set up my meeting with Pastor Peter in his office and when I told him I wanted to get involved with Holbrook Kids, his reaction was "I was just waiting on you to see when you were ready to begin with our kids ministry." He the reminded me that the church was still looking to hire a Children's Pastor. I will admit I did love hearing that, but knew I needed to get to know the kids at the church. That following Sunday I was handed my curriculum and would be teaching first and second grade the last Sunday in January as well as the entire month of February. The week before I began teaching, I had the privilege of not only attending but volunteering at the Children's Pastors Conference in Orlando, FL. I attending this conference many times while I was on staff at SGT. My very first one was 1990 in Denver. This time I wanted to give back to that conference by volunteering. I helped serve in the bookstore. It was great being amongst other children's pastors and I will admit I felt like the old man there. I was excited to come home to a new challenge at CCH.

    At my very first experience at Holbrook Kids I was shocked. I was expecting loads of kids but only saw we had 10. Holbrook Kids was launched the previous October and being in the sanctuary that had about 60 + people I thought there were tons of kids. I was wrong. My class had 3 kids on a good day maybe 5. I was so used to having 45 + kids at SGT so working with a small group was a challenge but if you know me, you know I love challenges. I also taught during the month of May as we rotated every 3 months. It was so amazing being back doing what I love! At the end of May, Pastor Peter approached me and said he wanted to meet with me. I had no idea what the meeting was about. I continued working as a manager at Chick Fil-A Port Jefferson 6 mornings a week so our meeting was on a Monday afternoon. Pastor Peter asked me a question I had wanted to hear for four years. "Would you be interested in being our Children's Pastor?" I said yes of course! I was introduced to the church that following Sunday and a vote was taken at a membership meeting the Sunday after that. 34 Yes...2 No! The position would be a paid position and I would have a 6 month trial period. I started on June 1st and was excited about the new challenge. Some people might think I was taking a step down after serving at a huge church. I did not feel that way at all. I had always said a would love a job where I could help build a children's ministry and watch it grow with God's help.

     The first order of business was learning the ropes of how they do Vacation Bible school. It was a lot different than VBS at SGT where we had over 400+ kids. I always believed VBS was meant for smaller churches, not big churches. Many people at SGT disagreed with me. At CCH, Pastor Peter asked me to do one of my ventriloquist figures for the VBS worker meeting and I chose Shelton the Shark. The workers had never seen me do that and they loved it. Our VBS took place in early July and my job was not only to learn the ropes for 2019, but to be the Bible teacher. out theme was Maker Fun Factory by Group Publishing. I also opened each program, which was in the evening with Grandpa Lou, my ever popular puppet friend as well as Shelton and Sonkist. We had well over 50 kids at VBS and the week was a success. We had a closing program the following Sunday morning where the kids sang the songs they learned that week with many parents attending. The majority of the kids who attended were from other churches. My prayer was that they would begin coming to CCH.

   After VBS, I organized a program for the kids on Wednesday nights I called "Wacky Wednesdays." It was a fun night planned for all ages with themes such as Christmas in August, Hawaiian Beach Party and Wet & Wild night to name a few. My hope was that the kids from VBS would come but that didn't happen. Attendance was low and I was frustrated but I figured maybe it was because It was in August where families go on vacation. During the fall season I was all geared up to begin running Sunday mornings and Wednesday nights. I found it challenging especially Wednesday nights. Trying to run a program where you have 4 year olds and 4th graders together is difficult. I started feeling like maybe I was losing my edge as a children's pastor. I tried making videos for the kids on Sunday mornings and tried to bring in new ideas but I never felt like I was connecting. Looking back I think I was hoping to make CCH a mini SGT. I was used to a huge budget, a huge room to work with and tons of kids. CCH had a small budget and although a beautiful Holbrook Kids logo was painted on the wall, the rooms were small and multipurpose. My 6 month trial period was over and I began to wonder if this was really for me. In November, I knew in my heart I would not be asked to come on staff as an associate pastor. The board met with me in early January and I was told they wanted to go in a different direction. I was expecting to hear that and truthfully I was cool with it. It seemed as though God had other plans for me. I will always be grateful to Pastor Peter for the opportunity I had to serve at CCH and would like to thank him. During the fall. I attended a small group that did a church-wide DVD series called "Life on Mission." We had such a great group of people and they asked me to lead  a bible study. I sad "yes" and that bible study is still meeting on Tuesday mornings to this day. As the calendar changed to 2018, God had new opportunities for me and new challenges that I will write about in the coming weeks.

UNTIL NEXT TIME           

    

CHRISTIAN CHURCH AT HOLBROOK - July 2016 - January 2017

     At this point in my life, I was not looking to go on staff at any church. My biggest concern was where I was going to live after October 1, 2016. I was not looking to join any staff. I was happy working at Chick Fil-A as a manager. But God had other plans. In the middle of July, I received a text from two friends Tim and Jack. Both text's said the same thing and the crazy thing was Tim and Jack had never met, but they had a mutual friend, Stan (Not the Stan who owned and operated Chick Fil-A Port Jefferson by the way) who attended Cjistian Church at Holbrook. Both text's were similar. "Hey, there is a church in Holbrook looking for a Youth Pastor." My first thought was "I am in no way a youth pastor. I am a children's pastor." I said no to both of them twice but both of these dear friends were persistent and I'm so glad they were. "Just call the pastor and check it out." I checked out the church's website then called the pastor, Pastor Peter O'Leary. We set up an appointment to discuss the position and get acquainted. I truthfully felt it would go absolutely nowhere because of my family situation. I will never forget pulling up to the church on an extremely hot day and ringing the doorbell of the church. I was greeted by the pastor who had a big smile on his face and we went downstairs to the youth room to talk. For about an hour I told Pastor Peter my story about SGT and my marriage as well as what my role would be if I was hired by the church. I was open to exploring the possibility of being a children's and youth pastor but told him I was more experienced with children. We prayed together and he told me he would get back to me. I left not really expecting a call from him but again I was wrong. I did attend a Sunday morning service to see what the services were like. Pastor Pete called me 2 weeks later and said his Christian Education Committee wanted to interview me. We made an appointment for a Friday night August 26th.

    I will admit I was nervous and had a glimmer of hope that maybe just maybe I could possibly get hired. It seemed that every time I had a plan for my future, God had a better one! I was brought to an area downstairs and met the committee which consisted of seven people including Pastor Pete. It felt like more. For about two hours they asked me every question imaginable from what took place at SGT, my marital status, my theology and my vision for the children of the church. The main topic was about my divorce. That was one area I knew would be a challenge. I left the church feeling good about everything and put it in God's hands. Two days later I attended the Sunday morning service again not really expecting a decision to be made. After the service, Pastor Pete asked to speak to me. He said it is obvious I have an amazing talent with children and great giftings. However, the committee decided that not only was I not ready to begin my ministry there, they were not ready either. He told me he felt I needed to be ministered to and the church would welcome me with open arms. I was happy to attend services there during the fall. I got involved with a Men's small group and not only attended Sunday mornings, I also attended special events to get to know the members of the church. I was happy to be attending a small church and knew in due time I would be at least volunteering with the children of the church. I always felt it was God's way of telling me he wanted to use me but not right away. In the meantime, God also provided a place for me to live. My landlady from Sound Beach where I lived in 2015 visited me at Chick Fil-A and told me she had an apartment available. God was answering prayer!      

UNTIL NEXT TIME  

CHICK FIL A - September 2015 - July 2016

    Let me back up a few months to June 2015. God opened two doors for me to preach. One opportunity was at the church I was attending...Middle Island Baptist Church. The second was at Cornerstone Bible church in Port Jefferson Station, NY. I had opportunities to share at the Christian school Cornerstone supported, North Shore Christian School at their  Elementary chapel services. Cornerstone asked me in January if I would preach in June. They were having a church wide retreat and needed coverage. I was happy to help! I always appreciated what the church was doing and felt confident in my preaching abilities. What happened next to me in the next few months still blows me away.

     With so much uncertainty about where I would work and live, Pastor Mike, the then associate pastor now Senior Pastor of Cornerstone called me and said he needed to meet with me. I had no idea what it was about and thought maybe he needed me to share in church or maybe do a Kids Krusade. As I sat in his office, he told me that the Senior Pastor of the church was retiring and his house would be available. How would I like to live in the house...WHAT??? I asked him to repeat it because I thought I was dreaming. In return I would need to help on Friday evenings with their Awana Club. He also told me he would help set up counseling for me wife and I. I was so blown away. What happened next was definitely God. That exact morning before my meeting with Pastor Mike, I ran into Stan Abrahamsen at Panera Bread. I had not seen Stan since I resigned from SGT. Stan was the Head Deacon at the church but was also building a brand new Chick Fil-A restaurant directly across the street and would be the owner/operator. We spoke briefly and I told Stan I was a sales rep at TruGreen. He gave me his number and told me to call him. Two weeks later I saw Stan at a diner in Lake Grove. He was sitting with some gentlemen from Chick Fil-A and introduced me. He then said "Hey, you need to come to my house and do an estimate". We agreed on the following Saturday.

   I drove to Stan's beautiful home not thinking about Chick Fil-A or working there. I was there to do an estimate for lawn care...period. God had other plans. As I sat on the steps of Stan's backyard deck, Stan came around the back and was smiling. "Hey Dave. How would you like to apply for a position at Chick Fil-A?" My mind drifted back to the fall of 1985. At that time in my life I needed extra money so I took a job at a Friendly's in the Smithaven Mall...at the grill. I remember telling my Dad when I got home about me new job. He laughed so hard that he was crying. If you know me, you know I am NOT Chef Boyardee. I burn cereal and can't cook to save my life. Stan told me I would be hired to prep food and work in the back. All I needed to do was apply. I didn't know it at the time but Stan told me later that God had spoken to him and told him to hire me. WOW! The following day at Panera Bread I applied and received a call that week for an interview. I was hired! After realizing my career as a sales rep was over I had to give TruGreen notice out of respect. I nervously walked into my boss Mike's office and told him the news. He said to me he was so happy for me and was actually going to lay me off that day. He then told me it was a privilege having me work for him and that he appreciated my hard work. My last day was September 19th.

   Exactly one week later Chick Fil-A had their worker orientation. The Port Jefferson store was the very first in the state of NY with a drive thru. I proudly wore my black chef outfit and was so happy I wouldn't have to face people from my previous church who might "ask questions." Working in the back would be awesome! Two days after the orientation my cell phone rang and it was Chick Fil-A. "Hey, we think you are a better fit for us in the front of house. You seem to be a people person and we need you to work in the front. Are you willing to switch?" I said, "Of course. Wherever you need me!" We began our training the week after orientation from young people who came from all over the country to train us. We had lessons on how to fill drinks, make shakes, take orders at the register, do headset...every area possible. Chick Fil -A Port Jefferson officially opened on October 7, 2015. I had to report to work at 5:30 a.m. There were hundreds of people outside as well as the local news ready for that magical moment when the doors were opened. I will never forget the trainers telling us "Just run food to tables and to the "carry out" guests all day. After a few days you will be trained effectively." All I can say is after day number one I was exhausted. I never did more walking in one day in my life. I got home that night, sat in my chair and fell sound asleep. Day two we did it all over again.

     I really enjoyed working at Chick Fil-A and still do. I made friends that will last a lifetime. I will forever be grateful to Stan for the opportunity I had to serve at CFA Port Jefferson. We all worked hard but we also had a lot of fun. I opened the restaurant as a team member 5 days a week and worked a midday shift on Saturdays. What was also great was that I lived exactly one mile from the restaurant. As crazy as it sounds, I also worked at Kohl's during the holidays which was insane. I don't know how I did it!!! Life was good and things were going well until my wife and I started our counseling. All I can say it was a huge train wreck. I wish I could say our marriage was healed and things were amazing but unfortunately that is not true.

    After working at Chick Fil-A six months, I was promoted and became the opening manager. I opened the restaurant for the next year and a half and loved the new challenge. My hope was for a possible position at Cornerstone Bible church as maybe an associate pastor but due to my marriage situation it did not happen. In fact Cornerstone gave me three months to find a new place to live. I was frustrated but it was July and in the past few years God had always dome amazing things for me. What happened in July 2016 also blew me away. It was God at work but I'll save that for next time!!

UNTIL NEXT TIME               

Working at TruGreen - March - September 2015

      In February of 2015, I knew I had to get out of the "Limo business" so I started applying to every job imaginable. If you name a company, store or restaurant, I probably applied to it. I was constantly on my laptop sending applications all over. I tried Costco, Trader Joe's, Lowe's, Sam's Club, Hertz, Wal-mart and Panera Bread just to name a few. I stumbled upon one job that was posted on Indeed.com...TruGreen. I sent in an application thinking "What do I have to lose?' I was called in for an interview on Presidents Day. I had no idea what to expect nor did I really know what positions were being offered. I originally thought it was as a serviceman. I was called into an office for the interview by a man named Mike McPartland. This past summer, Mike unfortunately died of cancer. Mike kept looking at funny during the interview and kept saying, "You look so familiar." As it turned out, Mike attended Smithtown Gospel. I never saw him there but being the church has over 2500 attenders I can't possibly know everyone! Mike put me through for the next interview and I was hired as a Sales Rep!!! What??? I was happy although I knew absolutely nothing about being a salesman. I gladly gave my notice at the limo company and my last day was March 12, 2015. I began my TruGreen career 4 days later.

Life at TruGreen was bizarre. We had two weeks of classroom and field training. I remember going out with a team of 8 of us walking, knocking on doors and struggling to make "contacts". I walked with one trainer named Todd. After my first 10 houses he looked at my honestly and said, "Do you know what your problem is, Dave? You are way too nice!!" Yes!! I knew that. What TruGreen wanted you to do was knock on doors and don't leave the property until you have a door slammed in your face, you are cursed out or you are thrown off the property. Let's just say being a sales rep was not my gift. Trying to sell lawn care products was a huge challenge. The only thing I liked about the job was that I could sleep in! Work started at 11am and ended at 9 pm. 5 days a week and we worked Saturdays as well. I was happy to be doing a lot of walking sometimes 5 miles a day. I was happy getting paid and getting a nice tan. I found it stressful trying to make sales, calling up total strangers on the phone and basically being told to "bully" people. If you know me, you know that's not my style. Even the guys I worked with were "rough around the edges". When they all found out I was a pastor, they gave me the nickname "Preacherman."

While many of my fellow workers made sales by being bullies, I made sales by praying to God. I did very well when we had to sell "Hort", which is a program where you have trees and shrubs sprayed for insects that are doing damage. I am still amazed to this day that even though I was awful at this job, I made it to number 7 out of 24 sales reps. Many of them were laid off. I was able to keep my job until September and all I can say is that it was because of God blessing me. In July, however, I had thoughts about moving to Pennsylvania to start a new life. I thought maybe getting off of Long Island would be a good idea. Getting away from memories of SGT and stating over might be great. But God had other plans! God opened some doors for me to preach as well as minister at a children's camp and at Ocean Grove, NJ. It was His way of saying He needed me here on the "Island." Seeing God's hand on my life was amazing. What happened in August of that year still gives me goose bumps but I'll save that for next time!!        

Becoming a limo driver/ dealing with depression (July 2013 - March 2015)

  

My career at SGT was over and boy did it ever hurt. The only thing that took the focus off of me was the fact that the Music Pastor announced he was leaving as well. The announcement about both of us leaving was on the same Sunday. I wanted nothing more than to get a position as a children's pastor at another church. So, in the meantime I took a job driving for a limo company. I already had this job in October 2012 part time to help pay bills and worked Saturdays, Sunday evenings and Mondays. I called my boss and told him I would be available 6 days a week. And, I also told him I would probably only be working for him for maybe 3 months tops. Boy, was I way off. It would actually be 20 months!
Working as a limo driver was tough. You wake up at 3 am, drive total strangers to the airport and then you wait for your next job. You are all alone. I spent hours and hours at JFK airport in the limo lot. LaGuardia airport had no limo lot so I spent hours at a Burger King parking lot on Astoria Blvd. It was a very tiring job and honestly, I hated it. I hated being alone. It gave me way too much time to think. Without getting into details, my thoughts were not godly. I was angry. Angry at myself, angry at the church and angry with God. I wanted nothing more than to get hired by a church but deep down I knew I needed to heal. All I ever knew was how to minister to kids. The hours driving were long. You would get home at 8 at night and then eat, go to bed and do it all over again the next day. I hardly had any time with my family but I needed to work to pay bills. The company I worked for, TranStar Executive were very demanding with their drivers. I had to beg them to let me come in later one day a week so I could get some rest. They were always asking me to come in early telling me "we have no one else." The job was wearing me out. I was frustrated but my only hope was that maybe a church would hire me.
    I admit I was very cocky. I truly believed a church would hire me. After all, I was told I was the "Greatest Children's Pastor on the Planet." Who wouldn't want to hire me with my many years of experience! I applied to many churches. Big churches...little churches. Churches in NY, NJ PA, FL, CA, TX, CO...anywhere. Surely any church would call me, interview me, be extremely impressed with me? I discovered that it was ALOT harder than I thought. In the one year that I applied to churches, I only had four interviews. Just four. Three were in Pennsylvania and one was in New York. My very last interview was on the phone in May 2014 at a church in Staten Island. I honesty thought I had a shot. They asked me to call to set up a meeting with the pastor. I remember being in Manhattan driving my town car. When I called to set up an appointment with the pastor, the secretary answered and said they already hired someone. I was angry and in my car starting yelling at God. "What are you doing, God? Are you mad at me?" I actually thought that He was mad at me. The very next day was when I decided to no longer pursue any position. I became very depressed. My depression was not clinical, but truthfully an overwhelming feeling of sadness. I thought my life was over. Fast forward to July that year. I started having nightmares and twice thought I was having a nervous breakdown. I came very close to checking into Stony Brook Hospital's Psych ward, but I didn't.  I thank God for a godly Mom who prayed with me and for me. She always told me to keep my eyes on the Lord. The best advice I ever had! I did take meds for the depression which helped immensely.
   I started looking for other jobs and had interviews with Walmart (which pays nothing) and also applied as an Event planner with a company. God had other plans. In August, I started attending Middle Island Baptist Church. I was attending True North before that but found that there were former disgruntled SGT attenders now going there. They would gather at the end of the service to complain about SGT. I wanted no part of that! I attended Middle Island Baptist for about a year and made friendships there that will last a lifetime. I will forever be grateful to Pastor Lenny and Kathleen for treating me like family and helping me during my challenging season. I learned a lot about myself and wanted nothing more than to grow in the Lord. As the calendar changed to 2015, I did not know that the New Year would become a year of changes and growth. After a lot of prayer and pleading with God, my limo career came to an end in March 2015! I was hired to work at TruGreen Lawn Care as a Sales Rep. God was answering my prayers and showing me He is NOT mad at me but He has a plan for me!

UNTIL NEXT TIME      

3 challenging months

DISCLAIMER:
As I write this blog, my intent is in no way to bash my past employer, Smithtown Gospel Tabernacle or to criticize any member of my family. My 22 years on staff at SGT were amazing and I continue to pray for the pastoral staff and the leadership there. What happened 5 1/2 years ago is over with and done. Thank you.


   As I mentioned in my previous blog, I knew God had something big in store for me. I just didn't know when or where. In 2013, I started feeling very bored. I had been doing the same ministry for 22 years and wanted a new challenge. I started writing curriculum for our children's church that we called Kidz for Christ and also enjoyed making videos each week for the kids. Then the worst day of my life occurred. Let's just say that my senior pastor and I had a huge misunderstanding that spiraled out of control. I do not wish to share what was said to me in his office on April 11, 2013 nor do I wish to dwell on it. What happened 5 1/2 years ago is over with and done. What I will say is that I went into complete shock, I walked home to my house that was near the church and almost threw up in my kitchen sink. Deep down in my heart I knew my career at SGT was coming to an end. It was not the way I wanted it to end. I always dreamed about leaving SGT on a high note. Maybe even being able to preach my final sermon to the congregation. It turned out instead to be 3 challenging months. I truthfully don't remember very much that happened. Not only was I in shock, I became deeply depressed. I didn't sleep much and when I did I was on the couch watching TV. I wanted to laugh but I couldn't. I even went on www.churchstaffing.com and looked for a position. The very first church I contacted called me! I thought "Wow! This is going to be easy!" Little did I know I would experience ALOT of rejection from churches for 2 years!
      My very last time ministering was at the Smithtown Christian School Chapel service. My favorite activity!! I spoke at Grandparents Day in the sanctuary. Little did I know it would be the very last time I would do anything at the church. I was completely shut down by the leadership and again I don't remember a lot that occurred between April - July 2013. I remember a few meetings, I remember building a float for the Memorial Day, I remember my van breaking down on Brooksite Drive, and I remember packing up my office and house and having a yard sale. And I remember moving into my in laws house thinking it would only be temporary. It was not! My world was caving in. Everything was a blur. I thought my life was over...but it wasn't!
My last month at SGT felt like forever. My last Sunday there was July 21st. I shared with the congregation that my family and I were seeking what God had for us next, That was not the truth. I had no clue where we were going and put a phony smile on my face. I'm sure the pain I had inside was hidden for a few but obvious to some. The church gave my family and I a going away party that was scheduled in a small fellowship room. Because of the enormous turnout and support, the party was moved to a bigger room. All I remember about that party was the first 3 people walked up to me as I stood greeting people and said, "Something is not right here." I put that phony smile back on my face and said "No, everything is fine." I may have been a great actor with Grandpa Lou but that day I wasn't. Even a guy I went to High School with came and asked repeatedly "Where are you going, Dave." I had to walk away not only because I was annoyed, but because I had to hide my pain. I didn't know where I was going.
I do remember driving away after that party and feeling a heavy weight fall off me. I still shudder as I think about those 3 challenging months I had back in 2013. Little did I know then that God was about to take me on a huge adventure that I am still on 5 1/2 years later that I am happy to share with you.

SEE YOU NEXT TIME        

WHERE IT ALL BEGAN August 2011 - March 2013

Where it all began? Don't worry! I'm not going to go as far back as February 18, 1964 back in Overlook Hospital in Summit, NJ where I was born. I also won't mention growing up in NJ, moving to Long Island when I was 9 years old, graduating High school in 1982, attending Northeastern Bible College or getting hired at Smithtown Gospel Tabernacle in 1991. It all began for me at Friend, Nebraska in 2011. Friend, Nebraska? Yes!!

In 1996, I developed a program to teach young preteen aged kids about missions I later called Kids in Missions. I was able to write a curriculum but also had the privilege of taking these kids with my to do ministry. They learned drama as well as puppet ministry. 15 years after starting this program, I had the privilege of taking 6 kids and 4 adults with me to Friend, Nebraska to help a church, Friend Christian Assembly to run a Vacation Bible School program. Nebraska is a beautiful state and very peaceful. There are a lot of cornfields and a lot of cornfields. Truthfully, there really isn't a lot to do. It's very flat and very hot. Most of the townspeople spend the afternoon at the pool. Farmers are seen out in their fields in the heat gathering corn and other veggies. 

Early one morning, I went for a walk. All around me were cornfields. I was feeling very peaceful and relaxed. It was that morning in August 2011 that I heard God's voice speak to me. It was of course not like the movie "Field of Dreams" but it was His still small voice that said to me "Dave, I have something big for you to do." At that point in my ministry, I was feeling like my time at Smithtown was coming to an end. I had been on staff 20 years and truthfully felt like I had accomplished a lot. I was getting bored. Hearing that from God gave me excitement and something to look forward to. Little did I know that my life would change just 2 years after that. It was not what I planned, but God wanted to do a work in me.

When I returned home I shared what God had said to me in Friend, NE with a few of the pastors including the senior pastor. My hope was that they would share in my excitement and maybe give me some direction. I inquired about a position that was available at SGT, the Young Adults Pastor, but was told my gifting's were with the children and to stay with that. Truthfully, during that season in my life I was frustrated. I was not given any opportunities to preach. I appreciated being asked to share at the Smithtown Christian School chapel services but I was longing to use my talents on a Sunday morning. It never happened. When my daughter graduated from the Christian school in 2012, I was hoping they would ask me to be the keynote speaker but again, I was ignored.

I felt like an outsider and began to question where I fit in. I seriously hated just going through the motions of ministry. I was dying to have a new challenge. I would many times daydream about having anew opportunity somewhere else and helping a church start a new children's ministry but it was not God's plan. When the calendar year changed from 2012 to 2013 I did not know it would be the most difficult year of my life. I'll save that for next time.

SEE YOU NEXT TIME